If an anxious thought about yourself or your family comes up during the day, try to set it aside. Tell yourself that you will be able to think it through later, during your worry time. This will get easier with practice. It should be roughly the same time each day (e. g. from 4:30 to 5:00 p. m. ). It should also be early enough that it won’t make you anxious right before bedtime. It is important that when your worry period is up, you actually stop worrying. Get up and go do something else to help take your mind off the fears you were just mulling over.
Begin with simple tasks, like cooking dinner or doing the laundry. Try to focus on one task at a time.
In fact, the act of worrying can be a way of avoiding distressing emotions. If you’re in your head, worrying about something bad that may happen to your family, you are actually distracting yourself from your emotions. [5] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source Your worry may be a way you distract yourself from anxiety over things you can’t control. [6] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source Learn to self-soothe in the face of distress. When you begin to worry about your family, figure out what you can do to make the emotion more tolerable. This doesn’t mean you run from the feeling, but you make it less intense so you can deal with it. Try some of the following: Exercise, dance, clean the house, listen to soothing music, look at artwork or something beautiful, play with your pet, do a puzzle or play a game, watch your favorite TV show, volunteer, take a shower or a bubble bath, pray, read a book, laugh, sing, go somewhere beautiful and calming. [7] X Research source Start noticing the things you do that make you feel better, and the things that make you feel worse (such as binge eating, isolating yourself in your room, etc. ).
Realize that worrying about worst-case scenarios (“What if my dad gets cancer and dies?” “What if my plane crashes?”) doesn’t have the power to stop these things from happening. [10] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source Ask yourself: Is it possible to be certain about everything in life? Does worrying constantly about something bad happening have any advantages? Does it keep me from enjoying the present moment? Can I accept that there is a small chance something bad will happen, but the actual likelihood of it happening is very low?[11] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source
The goal of this is to allow your anxiety to calm down and to come to a place of acceptance. It will also help you begin to distinguish between solvable problems and those over which you have no control. [13] X Research source Ask yourself these questions, suggested by HelpGuide. org:[14] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source Is the problem something I’m currently facing, rather than an imaginary what-if? If the problem is an imaginary what-if, how likely is it to happen? Is my concern realistic? Can I do something about the problem or prepare for it, or is it out of my control? If you recognize that, no, there’s nothing you can do to eliminate the chances of your family getting injured or killed in a car accident (or other worry), you can work on accepting uncertainty about the situation. Remembering: worrying is not an action. Worrying about a car accident won’t somehow prevent a car accident. If you feel the problem is solvable, try to define the problem, brainstorm potential solutions, and make an action plan to start actively doing something, instead of simply worrying. [15] X Research source
Cry alone or with a friend. Make sure you’re in an appropriate place (embarrassment won’t help). [18] X Research source
It may help to set a “connection goal,” such as calling one friend per week. If you can’t bring yourself to actually call, write an email instead.
Learn to say “no. " Don’t say “yes” to that dinner with your friend when you know you’ll be working late to meet a deadline or agree to take on another project when you’re already swamped. Learn to distinguish between the things you “must” do and the things you feel you “should” do. [20] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source Change your situation. Are you a ball of stress by the time you arrive at work because traffic has you so frustrated? Find an alternate route, take the train, or see if you can start your day early to avoid the gridlock. Identify small changes you can make in your environment and everyday life to eliminate unnecessary stress. [21] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source Spend less time with people who stress you out. [22] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source Maybe you can’t eliminate these people from your life — it could be your mom or your boss or co-worker who stresses you out the most — but try to limit your contact with these people as much as possible. Tell your mom you’ll call her once a week, but you’re too busy to talk every day. Avoid a stressful coworker as much as possible. Find reasons to excuse yourself from his presence.
Try sitting in a comfortable spot and taking deep breaths. As you do this, imagine each of your thoughts is a bubble that floats out of you toward the ceiling and pops. Listening to a guided mediation can also help.
Adults should get between seven and nine hours of sleep each night. Teenagers need between eight and 10 hours, and school-age children should get nine to 11 hours. [27] X Research source
Anytime you feel worry coming on, stop and count five of your blessings. Some example may include: your family, your health, nice weather, some time to yourself, or a satisfying meal.
