Once you see that you’re the source, you’ll stop blaming the people around you and will see that you’re in control of the situation.
These are important questions to ask yourself. Chances are, you’ll see that you’re making a big deal over nothing and will be able to move forward without throwing a fit. Making a big deal over every little thing will not help your mental state. It’ll make you stressed out, sleepless, and generally irritable. Remember that minimizing your problems will actually make you feel better. If you make a big deal over everything, then no one will take you seriously when something that is actually devastating happens to you.
Of course, building confidence takes a lifetime. The sooner you start realizing that your worth should come from yourself, not from what people people think of you, the sooner you’ll stop creating drama. Really think about yourself. Nobody’s perfect – what are your flaws? How can you work on addressing – or accepting them? Part of feeling good about yourself is hanging out with people who make you feel good. Are there people like that in your life? If everyone around you is focused on putting you down, then you won’t be able to feel good about yourself until you ditch them.
Don’t give people so much power over you. Instead of obsessing over what they did to you, work on doing things to make your own life better. Ask yourself why you need to look for sympathy all the time. You don’t really want that kind of attention all the time, do you? Sometimes, you may really need sympathy, so don’t use up your sympathy points over nothing just to get attention.
Instead, work on having fun with where you are, whether you’re with friends or taking a long walk. Stop obsessing over the past and you’ll soon find your way to a much healthier mindset.
Try journaling at least once a day. If you have to talk to a friend about something that’s been bothering you, for example, consider writing about the conflict first so you feel more calm about it. But remember, do not let anybody see any important things you have written in your journal. This could lead to more drama that you don’t want, so be careful.
Engaging in an argument is a choice. If someone wants to talk to you about something, insist that you’ll only do it in a calm or reasonable manner.
Of course, you may be attracted to people who are high drama. The next time you meet someone like this, ask if it’s really worth it. This goes for friendships, too. Stop hanging out with your frenemies just so you have something to complain or be mad about. Only maintain friendships with people you actually care about.
Be honest with yourself. You may think you’re ready to deal with a situation, but if your hands are shaking, you’re tapping your feet, or you feel your temperature rising, then you may need some more time.
Pick up a new hobby, like painting or writing poetry. You’ll find that this is a much more useful way to release some of your energy. Volunteer. Spending time with people who are actually in need will remind you how much you have to be thankful for – instead of complaining about everything. Even if you don’t believe you’re the type to stir up drama when bored, finding other ways to occupy your time can help.
Instead, work on respecting people, and recognizing that they have to deal with problems (and sometimes, drama!) too.
Don’t be afraid to say, “Hang on, I need a minute to figure out how to react…”
Talking to someone who actually cares about you first will help you see that you don’t have to tell everyone about something the second it happened just because you absolutely have to get it off your chest. Instead, learn to be patient. Blurting things out won’t help you deal with them.
Think about it: if you feel like people only pay attention to you when you’re having drama, then you have to seriously work on finding a positive way to channel your energy.
Take the time to calm down and to discuss the problem in a rational manner instead of getting caught up in the heat of the moment. Sure, it’s easier to just complain about the person than to deal with it. But if you deal with the problem head on, the person will have more respect for you, and you’ll improve your relationship. Take the time to hear the person out. Don’t just tell the person everything you’re feeling and expect him or her to have nothing to say.
Instead of talking about people behind their backs, start praising people behind their backs. This will make you and everyone around you feel better.
If you talk more quietly, people will want to be around you more. Nobody wants to be around a person who completely dominates them in conversation.
People seek out good listeners because they are so hard to find. If you learn to truly listen to people, you’ll be a much better friend – and much better person – in the process. Recognizing that other people have drama, too, will help you see that your drama isn’t that exciting, after all.
