If you make the effort to talk to her, she will get the idea that you care about her – especially if you make a habit of asking her how she’s doing. This is a low-risk way to show her that you’re interested. The better you get to know her, the easier it will be to show her that you care. Also, getting to know her may make you care about her more – and her care for you may also blossom!
Start with basic questions: “How’s your day going?” or “How was your weekend?” or “Nice shirt – that’s my favorite band! Do you like them?” Segue into more advanced questions: “How did that [specific thing] go?” or “Do you go there a lot?” or “Have you ever seen them live?” Don’t only ask questions, or you might make her uncomfortable. Share your own experiences, and make jokes. Have a conversation, not an interrogation.
She may find it irritating if you zone out and forget things that she has told you – whether these are things that she wants you to do, or just details from her life. Remember the little things she says; things that are just comments or sayings. For instance: if she just at some point mentioned that she has always wanted to go to the lighthouse, plan a surprise trip and take her there. She will appreciate that you remembered a small comment and made it come true.
Be ready to help her out if she’s struggling with something – but always give her the chance to figure it out herself! Even if you just offer, she’ll know that you care. Bear in mind that not every girl wants things done for her. Being thoughtful does not mean assuming that she cannot do things herself; it merely means that you want to make her happy.
Consider writing her a song, if you’re musical. Draw her a picture, if you’re artistic. Write her a poem, if you’re good with words. Make her a piece of jewelry, if you’re crafty. Use what you have, and make it personal. If she’s been talking about something for a while, consider buying it for her to show her that you’ve been listening. Be careful not to get her things that she doesn’t want: she will still see that you care, but she may feel less appreciative.
Back off if she seems uncomfortable with you getting close to her loved ones. Read between the lines, and know where her boundaries lie. She may just not be ready – or there may be a deeper problem in your relationship.
Asking a girl out doesn’t have to mean that you’re exclusive, and it doesn’t need to be anything more than an invitation. It is a way to tell her outright that you care about her, and it is a way to test whether she cares about you too.
If you know the girl well, you can bring this up just about whenever you like; but if you are still beginning your relationship, you may consider waiting for a quiet and sentimental moment. Tell her when you’re sitting together on the lawn, or when you’re staring at the stars, or when you’ve been walking together for more than a few minutes. This admission doesn’t need to be in a romantic context. It can just be a statement to a friend: “I just want you to know that I have your back,” or “You should know that I really value your presence in my life. "
Keep it simple. You don’t need to impose any expectations onto her, and your care doesn’t need to be anything more than what it is. Make it clear that you mean what you say, and that you aren’t trying to get anything from her.
