Instead of thinking about how you’re going to respond, just focus on what they’re saying. [3] X Expert Source Sandra PossingLife Coach Expert Interview. 13 August 2020. Make eye contact and face the person while they are talking. Ask them questions if anything they say is unclear to you. Let them know you are listening by rephrasing or echoing what they say now and then.
For example, you might have a coworker who performs a specific task different than you do. Their approach might be very different, but still effective. Or, you might have a classmate whose family observes a different religion than your family, so their holiday celebrations might be nothing like your family’s celebrations.
For example, you can read biographies, watch documentaries, or read/watch interviews with people who are from different countries, ethnic backgrounds, religions, or political parties.
For example, if you volunteer at a local homeless shelter and hear about some of the stories people there share about sleeping on the street, then you might begin to feel fortunate for having a roof over your head and a bed to sleep in each night.
Make sure that you are respectful when you attend the service. You may even want to contact them ahead of time and ask if visitors are welcome. Try saying something like, “I am curious about your religion. Are visitors welcome to attend services?”
As you immerse yourself in a new culture, try to avoid judging or making assumptions. Instead, go in with a curious mindset and try to learn as much as you can. [9] X Expert Source Sandra PossingLife Coach Expert Interview. 13 August 2020. Look into organizations that sponsor volunteers to travel to different countries, such as the Peace Corps, Doctors Without Borders, or even a local religious organization.
For example, you might feel sympathy for a homeless person on the street because their situation seems unpleasant. However, if you feel empathy for this person, you would have imagined what it is like to sleep on the hard concrete, wear the same clothes each day, beg people for money to buy food, and worry about your safety day after day.
For example, if the person describes what it was like to be discriminated against as an African American living in the South during the 1960s, you might imagine that they felt anger, frustration, sadness, helplessness, and hopelessness about being treated poorly due to the color of their skin.
This may be as simple as acknowledging someone’s pain and offering to help in any way you can. For example, if someone has just experienced the death of their family pet, then they might appreciate it if you said, “I’m so sorry for your loss. Is there anything I can do to help?”
For example, if someone called you an insulting name, how might you feel? What would your reaction be? Use these feelings to help you understand how someone who is different from you might feel and react if they were treated poorly.
Write out your list of people and/or groups of people.
Write out your reasons for feeling alienated from these people or groups of people.
For example, you might feel very different from someone who comes from a different country and religious background than you, but you probably both care about your friends and families, appreciate basic human rights and freedoms, and want to be successful. Focus on these common interests and this may help you to feel empathy for the person or group of people you have identified.
