Sometimes the thing your cousin does that bugs you will go away quicker if you don’t say anything. Often people will realize that they are being annoying later. If you don’t say anything, it is more likely that they will realize they were being annoying.

Be a big person, do not mutter under your breath, roll your eyes, make faces at other people, or bang things on the table. This shows that you are annoyed.

Ask yourself, what good will fighting with him or her over this particular situation get us tomorrow or in a month?

Be careful not to overuse your breaks or your headphones. If you stay tuned out all of the time it will damage your relationship with your cousin.

Create a gentle pause in the situation or conversation. Say something like, “Hey, I have a question. " Then wait a couple of seconds before starting. Acknowledge the thing your cousin is doing. Don’t bring attention to the fact that it is annoying, instead be matter of fact about it. Say, “I see that you are playing your video games, but I was curious about what you are doing this weekend with your friends. I wanted to know who is going to grandmas and if you will bring anyone. "

Once you start to notice yourself dwelling on all of the things that your cousin does that you don’t like, do something to distract yourself. Listen to some music, read something, talk to someone or do something.

For example, you might think “I know he is being loud just to get on my nerves”. But, there may be something else going on with them. Maybe they are being loud while they play video games because they had a bad day at school. The next time you find yourself assuming that you know why your cousin is doing something, ask them about it instead. Say “Why do you say that?”

Ask them open ended questions. Ask them why they love the things that they do, or ask them about their relationships. Listen closely and do not interrupt. Show them that you are listening by nodding along, making noises, and keeping eye contact with them Ask good follow up questions. Show that you were listening and ask them more questions related to the topic they were talking about. Bring in the other information that you know about your cousin. You can say something you know about another friend, say “So does your new friendship with Maria make your best friend Anna feel left out?

Tell your cousin stories about your life. They like to hear about what is going on with you, too. Laugh with your cousin. Make fun of each other or laugh at the things that happen to you. Having a sense of humor can help diffuse the situation in the future when you are getting on each others nerves.

If your cousin is busy, ask them when they would be free to talk.

The best performing teams give each other five pieces of praise for every criticism they give. [6] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Business Review Online and print journal covering topics related to business management practices Go to source Your cousin may not feel like you like them very much, and hearing this might open them up to listening to you. If you do not usually talk in this way, you can go through this step in a way that seems more true to your personality. But you need to make sure that your cousin does believe that you do care about them.

Give real examples of how you cause the problem too. For example, you can say “I know that I hurt you when I told you that you were not good enough for the basketball team. " Apologize and own what you did. For example, tell your cousin “I am sorry. I was angry, and I shouldn’t have said that. " Tell them the things you will do differently in the future. You can say, “I am going to think about what I have to say before I blurt out when I am angry. " If you have lots of examples of how your cousin is the problem but have no similar examples of how you also have done things to hurt the situation, it will make your cousin less likely to believe that you are being sincere.

For example, you can say “when you don’t tell me the truth it makes me feel like I can’t trust you. " Avoid sounding judgemental. You can be clear, but you do not have to sound judgemental. Don’t say things like “when you always lie”, instead, say “when you do not tell me the truth”.