Three out of four rapes were committed by someone known to the victim, while 93% of juvenile sexual abuse victims knew their abuser. [2] X Trustworthy Source Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network Largest anti-sexual assault organization in the US providing support and advocacy for survivors Go to source It can be very difficult to stop caring about what other people think. If you are still feeling compelled to stay in an uncomfortable situation, you could think to yourself: They started it! The person who is making you feel uncomfortable clearly doesn’t care about your feelings, so why should you care about theirs?
Make sure someone else not at the event knows where you’ll be and who you’ll be with. [3] X Expert Source Collette GeeRelationship Coach & Certified Violence Prevention Specialist Expert Interview. 1 May 2020. If you are going to an event with your friends, talk to each other beforehand about looking out for each other, or coming up with an emergency “get me out of here” word that can be employed when someone feels unsafe. [4] X Trustworthy Source Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network Largest anti-sexual assault organization in the US providing support and advocacy for survivors Go to source For example, if you are meeting someone new for a drink at a restaurant and they are making you uncomfortable, you could excuse yourself to the bathroom and inform a server you need help, ask the kitchen staff if you could leave through the back entrance, or ask another person in the bathroom for assistance.
Always carry extra cash for a taxi. Be wary of offers of rides from strangers, even if they appear concerned.
Be very wary of others buying you drinks. You could accept the drink and not drink it or put it down somewhere and “forget” it. Hold onto your drink and cover it with the top of your hand. Watch the bartender or party host make your drink or open your drink in front of you, even if it’s just a bottle of water. [6] X Expert Source Collette GeeRelationship Coach & Certified Violence Prevention Specialist Expert Interview. 1 May 2020. Predators can drug your drink to make you feel extremely drunk, confused, or weak, and likely be unable to defend yourself from a sexual assault. These drugs are commonly known as “date rape drugs” and include Rohypnol, GHB, and ketamine.
For example, say you are at a party and notice a man groping a woman who seems very intoxicated. Team up with another guest to help extract her from the situation. You could go over to her and say, “We have been looking for you! We have the best news we want to share!” Pull her away from the other person and ask her if she needs help. If the man seems dangerous, consider alerting the party host and/or calling the police.
If you hide a spare key outside your house, make sure it is in a well-hidden spot, not under the doormat. Even better, give a spare key to a neighbor you trust. Keep your phone by your bed. Consider putting a security company’s sticker on your window or sign in your yard to serve as a deterrent, even if you don’t have a security service. If you feel you are being followed on your way home, don’t go home. Switch directions and head toward a public place instead.
If you can, make a mental description of a suspicious individual’s appearance, including your best guess of their age, height, weight, and ethnicity. When walking or running, stay on populated, well-lit paths. Do not wear headphones. [9] X Research source In general, keep your eyes peeled for anyone who seems to be giving you a little too much attention. [10] X Expert Source Joseph BautistaSelf Defense Trainer Expert Interview. 30 April 2020.
Duck into a store or restaurant and get help from employees. You could approach a person or group of people and say loudly, “Oh, there you are! I’ve been looking all over for you!” Once out of earshot, explain the situation and ask if they can help you. If there is no one else around and you can’t enter a building safely, try making, or pretending to make, a call on your cell phone. You could say, “When are you coming to pick me up, Dad? I’ve been out here for fifteen minutes!”[11] X Research source Always call 911 if you feel threatened. It’s better to be safe than sorry.
Walk as if you know where you’re going, even if you’re lost. If you’re lost, find a police officer to help you. Women with children are also a good option. Avoid walking alone at night if you are in an unfamiliar area. [12] X Expert Source Joseph BautistaSelf Defense Trainer Expert Interview. 30 April 2020. Walk with a friend or get a ride.
You can often find these classes in community centers, colleges, or in martial arts studios. Consider carrying a keychain with a whistle or other small, self-defense device attached to it. You can find these available for sale online.
There are several mobile apps you can install on your phone that let you call for help or alert friends to your location. Try searching for “personal safety phone apps” to get started.
For example, if someone sits next to you on the bus and intentionally leans too far into your personal space, yell, “Get away from me!” Attract attention and have others help you deal with the situation. Do not be afraid to defend yourself if you feel you are being threatened with physical harm.
You can do privacy check ups on all social media sites and make sure you are sharing what you want to share. You can also go back and edit or delete old posts if you wish. For more information, check out the privacy settings of your social media platform, like Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter. Report harassing comments or images to the social media platform. Delete anything you are not comfortable with, and block any users who are making you uncomfortable.
If you are comfortable sharing your location, you could also broaden your location to a metro area rather than a specific town. For example, “Bay Area” or “Greater NYC. ”[14] X Trustworthy Source Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network Largest anti-sexual assault organization in the US providing support and advocacy for survivors Go to source
Meet the person in a public place, like a busy coffee shop, for the first time. Tell a friend your plans, and have them call or text you while you’re there to check in. Come up with a code word to use if things are not going well, and the friend can help you leave the situation easily. If you need to travel in order to meet this person, do not tell the person where you are staying. Stay at a hotel or a friend’s house, not with them. Utilize your own transportation during the trip.
Do an online search. Look up the person you are about to meet to verify they have given you the correct information. You may wish to look them up on the National Sex Offender Public Website to see if they are a registered sex offender. Have an exit plan. Tell the person you can only meet for an hour, or have another event to attend. Use your own transportation so you don’t need to rely on the person for a ride.
For example, say you are on a first date. Your date keeps insisting you get the bill and head back to their place. You are not interested and want to leave. You could say, “I can’t. I promised my roommate I’d let her dog out tonight. ” If your date keeps pressing you, just say, “No, I’m sorry,” and leave as soon as you can.
