Unnecessary physical contact can be a demonstration of affection. Create physical distance between the two of you to prevent it from occurring. [1] X Research source Don’t get too close. To avoid sending any mixed signals, make sure to maintain the physical distance you’ve created. [2] X Research source Avoid making prolonged eye contact if she attempts it. The longer you maintain eye contact with someone, the stronger they may interpret your interest to be. [3] X Research source
Getting upset about her mentioning other guys will indicate to her that you may be jealous because you have feelings for her. If it bothers you that she brings up other guys, try to change the subject in a polite manner that won’t give the wrong impression.
Don’t make effort toward spending time with her. While you may just want to spend some friendly time together, pursuing it could send the wrong signals. [6] X Research source Treat her like one of the guys. Treat her with the same respect and courtesy that you would treat your other friends, but don’t go out of your way to be particularly nice to her. Special treatment may lead her to believe you have feelings for her. [7] X Research source Mention other girls in a respectful manner. One way to hint that you aren’t interested is to bring up another girl that you are interested in. Be respectful in what you discuss, but it might serve to let her know that your interests lie elsewhere. [8] X Research source
Cross your arms when standing and your legs while sitting. This position shows that you’re “closed off” and not looking to make an emotional connection. [9] X Research source Don’t point your feet directly at her while speaking. While you may not consciously realize it, pointing your feet at a person while you interact is a good indicator of interest. She may be picking up on such subtle cues subconsciously. [10] X Research source Position things between you and her. By standing on the opposite sides of furniture, fixtures, or even just holding something in your hands between the two of you, you can convey a message of disinterest. [11] X Research source
If you are in the same group of friends, make sure there is always someone else around when you’re together. If you work together, try to avoid partnering up on tasks if possible and absolutely avoid social interaction outside of work.
Only lie if you really feel as though it’s the best way to convey your disinterest. Remember that it isn’t only what you say that matters, but the way you say it. Telling someone you have feelings for them can be scary, so be sensitive to how exposed she may feel. [12] X Research source
Saying things like, “I just went through a bad break up,” or “I’m not ready to date right now,” suggests that there is a timeline in which you may be available. Avoid excuses that have an expiration date. Saying that you’re very busy with school or work “right now” also insinuates that there could be potential for a relationship in the future.
Be firm, if the person has a hard time hearing you say no, be firm and resolute in a friendly tone. [14] X Expert Source Supatra Tovar, PsyD, RDLicensed Clinical Psychologist (PSY #31949), Registered Dietitian, & Fitness Expert Expert Interview. 6 October 2021. If you are friends, say that you “don’t want to ruin your friendship” or something similar. Doing so can demonstrate that you do care about her, but not in a romantic way. [15] X Research source Tell her that you are in a committed relationship. It’s an easy way of explaining your way out of a situation that leaves no feelings hurt. [16] X Research source
You may be able to simply tell her that you are not interested in a polite and friendly manner. Many people would appreciate your honesty. Some people may appreciate a more in-depth conversation. If she has expressed her feelings for you, it might help her to be able to discuss the situation a bit, as long as you’re comfortable. [19] X Research source
Don’t use language like, “I don’t think I can” or “I can’t” in your discussion. Passive language can make your motivations unclear and suggest that you may have wanted to pursue a relationship under other circumstances. [21] X Research source It’s okay to mention that the conversation isn’t easy, that may even help her to feel better, but don’t do so in a manner that suggests you wish things could be different. Saying something like, “this isn’t easy for me to talk about” demonstrates that you care, without going too far. [22] X Research source
Be mindful of your tone of voice. You want to sound calm, friendly and sure, but don’t leave her with a false impression. Don’t become defensive if she gets upset. Try to understand where she’s coming from and what is upsetting her. [23] X Research source Don’t be dismissive of what she has to say. Treat her with the same courtesy that you would hope to be treated with.
If she has expressed feelings for you or asked you out, tell her that you’re flattered by her interest. Be mindful of her feelings. Remain clear about your relationship, but friendly and pleasant in your demeanor.
