You can do this anywhere, not just out at a bar. If the player is in your school or someone from town, let him see you having fun with your friends no matter what you’re doing, whether it’s eating lunch or going shopping. Just make one thing clear: you do not need him.
He’ll notice you precisely because you didn’t notice him. Players expect to be worshipped by everyone around, and he’ll wonder why his magic didn’t work on you. You don’t have to be outright rude to him. Just look completely uninterested, like you have better things to do than to talk to him. But that doesn’t mean you should insult him or call him names, either.
Don’t let him make you laugh, ask you to dance, or lavish you with complements. If he insists on buying you a drink, you can let him, but don’t let it be an excuse for him to spend the night trying to charm you. Take the drink, thank him, and walk away.
Just by chatting or laughing with other guys, you’ll be showing him that you don’t need him. Don’t look over at the player to make sure that he sees you having a great time. He shouldn’t even consider that you’re trying to get his attention by ignoring him.
Play it cool. Don’t flatter him. Just let him know that you like talking to him. Keep things light and fun. That’ll make him want to talk to you more. Tease him a little bit. Don’t let him take himself too seriously or think he’s all that.
If you don’t let him charm you or flatter you, he’ll only become more persistent. That’s exactly what he wants. When dealing with a player, it’s always important to stay in touch with your reality. Move beyond the looks, charms, and compliments that typically go hand-in-hand with the player persona and focus on getting to know their character and core values. [1] X Expert Source Kate DreyfusHolistic Love Coach & Intuitive Healer Expert Interview. 22 November 2021.
If you have to leave, don’t tell him where you’re going. Let him guess. Make him figure out who you really are, from what you love to do to how many siblings you have. Let him do all of the work instead of doling out all of the information for him. Don’t keep him up to date about your schedule. If you’re busy over the weekend, you’re busy over the weekend. You don’t have to tell him it’s because you’re celebrating your Aunt Mary’s 50th birthday.
Always keep things light and fresh. Remember, you’re trying to play this guy, not marry him. Talk about the fun things you’ll do that day or that week – stick to the present. This player won’t be in your future. Laugh, don’t cry. This is not the person who should see your insecurities or the things that upset you.
If you really want to make him jealous, you can even pretend that you’re meeting another person when you’re not. If another guy calls you when you’re with the player, don’t be afraid to answer. Be fun and flirty as you talk to the guy who called you.
To gain the power to play a player, you have to stand out to him. It’s likely that every other girl in his life has been jealous. This is why you’ll be different. If someone calls or texts him, don’t say, “Who’s that?” Look bored or uninterested as he talks into the phone. If you see another person he knows, be extra nice to them. Show him that you don’t view them as competition.
Don’t waste time stalking his social media. Go online to do your own thing. If you know he’s out, leave him alone. Don’t text him or call him or he’ll think you’re obsessing over him. If he knows you’re out and he texts you, don’t get back to him until the next day. Let him worry about what you were up to while he was away.
If he cancels on you, don’t let him reschedule for the next day. Tell him you’re “booked” for the next few days. Make him feel like he really missed out by flaking on you, and he won’t do it again. When you’re with him, talk about your other friends or the fun things you do that don’t involve him. Let him see that you have a life outside of worshiping him. Don’t be afraid to set boundaries and stick to them! Our boundaries support our health, self-care, growing trust, and feeling safe with a person. [2] X Expert Source Kate DreyfusHolistic Love Coach & Intuitive Healer Expert Interview. 22 November 2021.
When he’s eating out of your hand, you’ll know it. He’ll be calling you all the time, complimenting you, acting jealous whenever another guy or other plans come up, or he’ll just want to spend all of his time with you. The look in his eyes will tell you all you need to know. If he was shifty-eyed or distracted in the beginning, but now he stares at you like you’re a true wonder, then you’ve got him where you want him.
You can also say goodbye just because you’re getting tired of playing him. It’s a tough job. If he starts getting really attached and even tells you he loves you – and actually sounds like he means it – then you should cut him loose immediately. If you wait too long to say goodbye, you may also begin to fall for him, so don’t forget to protect your heart.
Or if you really want to hurt him or get him back, just let him catch you out with another guy. When he sees you, don’t even look surprised or like you’ve been caught. That will hurt him even more and he’ll get the picture.
If you give in and do see him again, he’ll quickly lose respect for you. If he’s a true player, he’ll only want you if you don’t really want him all that much. Once you’ve played a player, you’ll be better at recognizing them in the future. Watch out for these cagey guys and protect your heart as you move forward in your love life. Remain humble. Don’t let this accomplishment get to your head; although it does add an extreme boost to your confidence (you might start to think that you can get any guy you want or feel that you’re “playing” some guys when they only look at you as a friend)the tables can turn quick if you get caught up (with other dudes). They might know the game a little better than you do.
