You should know when he’s brooding and wants to be left alone, or when he’s upset and wants to be comforted and to open up to you – if you mix up the two moods, you’ll either suffocate or alienate him. If he’s feeling irritated, after driving in traffic or having a less-than-stellar basketball game, just take it easy on him. It’s not the time to start cuddling up to him or to start gossiping about your friends. If you want to have a “serious talk” with your man, then wait until he’s in a good mood. If you try to bring up a serious subject when he’s stressed and has a lot on his plate, then you won’t get the results you want.
If he has a big basketball game coming up, bake him cookies or call him the night before to let him know you care. If he has a big test, interview, or important event coming up, praise him and let him know how special he is so he feels positive.
You don’t have to send him twenty texts a day telling him how hot he is or how you can’t wait to see him – this will make him a bit too overwhelmed. Make sure that your affection is mutual. If you always tell him how great he is but get nothing in response, then you may have a problem.
No matter how serious your relationship is, you shouldn’t have to spend every night together. Have a good time going out with your girls and let him go out with his boys without a problem. If you’re not hanging out that day, you can check in once or twice, but don’t call him every hour, especially when you know he’s with his friends, or he’ll start to get annoyed. If you really want to stop being clingy, then you have to be able to pursue your own interests, to have your own passions, and to be your own person without the man’s help. You should enjoy your time with your man, but your life shouldn’t revolve around him.
You can also take turns getting what you want – maybe you get to pick the restaurant for date night, and he gets to pick the movie. Don’t be one of those girls who always gets her way because her man thinks it’s easier to give you what you want than to put up a fight. In a good relationship, both people should be willing to compromise. Learn to have even-toned discussions instead of yelling when you have a disagreement.
If you have the urge to pick a fight, ask yourself why you want to pick the fight, and what you’re really angry about. Find a way to discuss this subject in a mature fashion. [6] X Research source
You need to know that there are some situations that you just can’t control. If he’s having a bad day, he’s just having a bad day – his world doesn’t revolve around you.
Don’t worry so much about planning the perfect date or the perfect romantic activity. You can have the most fun renting a goofy movie, hanging out at the mall, or taking an impromptu trip to the beach.
Touch him behind his ear or whisper into his ear, letting your lips graze his inner ear. Kiss the front and back of his neck, nibbling on it just the tiniest bit. Give him a sensual shoulder massage and see if it leads to something more. Gently caress the back of his head when you’re kissing. Place a hand on the small of his back when you’re talking. Plant a hand firmly on his chest.
Not every new thing you try will feel great – but be open to the process. You can go back to your old favorite positions and try new things in the middle. [8] X Research source Let him lead the way. He may have an idea of what he wants. If not, you can try something new first.
Don’t underestimate the good old movie theatre make out. Kissing in the car is another old favorite. Get frisky in public. Find a deserted and romantic location and have fun with your man.
Don’t think of reasons not to try something new – instead, think of all the reasons why it would be fun. Take an unexpected weekend vacation. Point your finger on the map and drive to the place you’ve chosen. Have fun exploring the new spot – and each other’s bodies.
Your man will appreciate your audacity and frankness and it’ll turn him on even more. If you’re in the mood, just go for it. If you get that loving feeling when your man is in the shower, just sneak in there and join him for a soap session.
Go to a sex store and pick up some whips, sex toys, and sexy clothing, no matter how ridiculous it may be. Invest in some incredibly sexy see-through lingerie. Have fun talking dirty over the phone or text to make your man think of you when you’re not there. He’ll love it.
Do something that you’ve never done before together at least once a month. It could be rock climbing, biking, or playing beach volleyball. Take a dance class together. Learning to salsa or ballroom dance will help you keep your bodies in sync as you explore new horizons. Find a new way to compliment your man every week. You can always think of more things that you love about him. Play hard to get once in a while. He shouldn’t feel like he can have you whenever he wants. Know that the chase is never over. He should be working as hard to pursue you as he did the day you met.
Do something that you’ve never done before together at least once a month. It could be rock climbing, biking, or playing beach volleyball. Take a dance class together. Learning to salsa or ballroom dance will help you keep your bodies in sync as you explore new horizons. Find a new way to compliment your man every week. You can always think of more things that you love about him. Play hard to get once in a while. He shouldn’t feel like he can have you whenever he wants. Know that the chase is never over. He should be working as hard to pursue you as he did the day you met.
If you can avoid gossiping or saying negative things about other girls in your orbit, your man will be impressed. Part of being in a healthy relationship means knowing that there are a lot of other appealing members of the opposite sex out there and recognizing that you won’t pursue them. If you think your man can’t be around a pretty girl without hitting on her, then you have a problem.
If your man is exhibiting less-than-desirable behavior, then it’s fine to point it out. But if you point out every little problem, from the way he chews his food to how he ties his shoes, then he’ll feel like you’re constantly nagging him. Nobody’s perfect. You should recognize that there are things about you that your man may not find ideal – but that’s okay.
Being able to let your man do his own thing on the weekend sometimes, to go to happy hour with his coworkers without you by his side every time, or to take a weekend trip to see his family without you is a sign of maturity and trust. If you feel like you constantly have to be by his side or you can’t enjoy yourself, then you won’t be able to keep your man happy for long.
Though it’s impossible for you and your man to be happy emotionally and sexually 100% of the time, you should both be happy the majority of the time for the relationship to thrive.
