Common physical symptoms of emotional trauma are trouble sleeping due to insomnia or nightmares, a racing or unsteady heartbeat, physical aches and pains all over your body, being easily startled, tiredness, trouble concentrating, agitation, being on edge, and tense muscles. [2] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source These symptoms can be signs of anxiety related to painful memories in the past. Engaging with and learning how to manage any anxiety that arises for you can help in easing the effects of painful memories in your everyday life.
For example, you could experience a large degree of anxiety around lakes because of a near death experience in water, or you could perhaps unconsciously avoid certain activities or locations that remind you of a deceased loved one. Whatever the case, learning exactly how such painful memories might be affecting your life in the present in order to come to terms with them and incorporating their effects into your everyday life. To figure out how they are impacting you, take an inventory of how you react to certain things. Think back to any noticeable changes you think you may noticed in yourself between the traumatic event and how you act now. If you aren’t sure you can see any changes yourself, ask those around you have different you act or if they have seen any changes in your behavior that may point to the areas of your life the memories have impacted.
Since breathing is one of the things you will typically always have some degree of control over, and it is connected to so many different physiological processes in your body, learning to regulate it can be a great tool for reducing anxiety when it arises. It can also be helpful to become more aware of your surroundings in general. [7] X Research source Do this first by yourself at home. Start by breathing in slowly, holding it in, and then releasing just as slow. Try to notice any sensations that arise when this occurs so you will be able to make such connections between your anxiety and your breath during other situations outside of your home.
If you are still worried about changes you could have made in the past associated with the memory, think about the ways you can avoid such events in the future. If it was not under your control, think about how far you’ve come since the event and focus on the positive aspects of your current or future endeavors. [8] X Research source
Sit down one day and simply write about any experiences that come to mind, in as much detail as possible. This can help you incorporate the effects of painful memories for two reasons. First, it can allow you to see connections between situations in your life and your emotions. Second, writing can act as a sort of cathartic experience whereby you can feel a sense of creative freedom that might help you avoid feeling pulled down by prior life events. If you struggle with this, start small by simply writing about what happened to you throughout the day. If you feel any urge to connect what happened to anything that happened to you in your past, allow those connections to be made without forcing your writing to go in one particular direction as opposed to another.
This doesn’t mean you should just hang out with anyone. It will likely take some degree of effort on your part to figure out what really brings you joy. But once you find an activity or group of people that do so, try to restructure your daily life in order to maximize the time you spend in such situations.
If you persistently feel isolated from others and unable to meet people who support you, it might be necessary to experiment by interacting with entirely new people in situations you wouldn’t typically be. This can lead you to meet the right type of people who might be able to support you in the ways that you need. This will also hopefully help you become less preoccupied with the past by giving you more interesting activities and people to focus on in the present. Try taking a class on mixed martial arts or yoga. You could even simply go on a walk in the park. The key here is simply to put yourself in situations in which you would not typically find yourself, or around people you would not typically hang out with. Painful memories can become part of a psychological feedback loop that become part of your everyday routine and habits otherwise.
Ask someone you trust, such as your best friend, your sibling, your parent, or trusted colleague, while approaching them without any preconceived notions.
There are online databases that help you look for the right group for you. You can also ask your doctor or a mental health professional for suggestions if you can’t find any on your own. [13] X Research source
If painful memories are keeping you from functioning on a day to day basis in the way that you want, and if the pain associated with them doesn’t seem to subside with time, visiting a mental health professional could be helpful. He or she can lend an ear to your story and suggest some tricks for dealing with such issues. In order to help you engage with painful memories that might have resulted in some sort of traumatic affection to your day-to-day life, a mental health professional might implement the following a myriad of techniques. [14] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source
Look for a mental health professional that specializes in this method if you think it might be effective for your particular situation.
By uncovering your past trauma and dealing with it using EMDR, you can move past your painful memories and go toward mental health. [16] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source