Those with antisocial personality disorder are often deceitful and manipulative. They lie, steal, or con people for their gain. They often are impulsive, reckless, and aggressive, which leads to fights. Talk to a doctor or therapist about antisocial personality disorder, or search online or buy books to read about the disorder.
Many people with this disorder will only seek treatment if forced to by a court system. Because one of the symptoms of ASPD is a suspicion and dislike of authority figures, often the person sees a therapist or doctor as an authority figure they can’t trust. This leads to a bad relationship. Try saying, “I care about you, and your behavior has started to worry me. I think you would benefit from medical treatment. ”
Therapy may also work on trying to connect behavior with feelings or emotions.
In a support group not tailored specifically to ASPD, your loved one may remain detached and emotionally distant. Some support groups can turn into places where they reinforce negative behavior, like talking about how to engage in criminal behavior. Talk to your loved one’s doctor or a local hospital to try and find a group in your area. You can also search online for a support group in your area.
You may feel tempted to give your loved one threats like you will tell the court they are not in compliance with their orders if they don’t go to therapy. Instead of threatening, try to help your loved one come up with reasons to continue or start treatment. You may explain that if they go to treatment that they have a better chance of getting out of trouble with the legal system and not going to jail again.
Some people may not know they have a problem, so you may have to provide examples of their behaviors. Others may be in denial or refuse to believe there is a problem. Some people with ASPD may be resistant or angry if you bring up the possibility that they have a personality disorder.
Treatment may be challenging for your loved one at times. They may get overwhelmed or upset, or they may get frustrated and want to quit. Continue encouraging them and being there as much as you can.
For example, many people with ASPD end up feeling depressed for a short while. Help them to understand and identify that these emotions are connected to depression or sadness. Be supportive of them during this time by understanding, listening, and helping them in any way they need to.
You may need to work with a therapist to find ways to connect emotionally with your loved one. You cannot make your loved one feel emotions or start to address their emotions. This has to be done with the help of a therapist. Once your loved one starts to embrace their emotions, you can start to try and connect to them.
Make your loved one aware of the destructive behavior they are engaging in, like lying or stealing, getting into fights, or hurting their loved ones.
You may need to learn to set boundaries or protect yourself.
ASPD can cause a lot of misunderstanding and confusion for the loved ones. Family therapy may give you a place to express your feelings, learn how to interact with your loved one, and cope with your feelings. You may also try a support group for families of those with antisocial personality disorder.
Your loved one may be aggressively violent, which may lead to physical harm to you or other family members. They may also be unnecessarily reckless and put people in harm. You may have to come up with physical boundaries, like only seeing them at certain times. You may have to demand that they not scream at you, physically touch you, or hit you. You may also have to refuse to ride in a car with them, for example. Try saying, “I am willing to talk, but you will not touch me or scream at me. ”[14] X Research source Your loved one may manipulate you, lie, or steal. They may do or say things to hurt you or damage your relationship. This may lead to emotional or mental boundaries. You may have to distance yourself or tell your loved one, “We can see each other, but not if you are going to yell at me or lie to me. ” People with ASPD may take advantage of any caring or compassion. You may need to protect yourself by setting boundaries for yourself. You may say, “I care about you and support your treatment, but I will not allow you to take advantage of me. ”[15] X Research source
These people may be friends or family who are connected to your loved one, or people who don’t know them at all. You may ask other family members or friends of your loved one to help you. You can’t do everything by yourself.
This means you may have to remove yourself from your loved one’s life or do something else to ensure your safety and emotional well-being.
