For instance, if you’re Irish Catholic and know nothing about Asian cultures, don’t have an imaginary partner who’s Asian, since other people would expect you to have learned at least a little something about your partner’s beliefs and practices. Instead, use someone you know fairly well to fill in all those gaps. Say you have a good friend who’s Italian and also Catholic. Since you share the same religious background, make your partner a Catholic Italian, too. Then use what you know about your friend’s family life as a template for your imaginary partner’s.
For example, if you’re telling a story about a dinner date, shift the focus away from your partner by talking about the food you ate or something funny that really happened at another table. If you claim to have gone together to some event that you actually went to by yourself (like a movie, show, or concert), talk more about the event itself. Let your partner “borrow” your own honest reactions. For instance, if you’ve telling someone about a really bad sci-fi movie that you saw together, say something like, “The special effects were so bad, Rick almost choked on his popcorn because he was laughing so hard,” if that’s really how bad they were. Establish that “Rick” was with you, but keep the focus on the movie that the two of you went to instead of on him.
Keep a diary of your imaginary relationship! Track what the two of you did and when. Add as much detail as you like. Use it for reference in case you become fuzzy on the details later on. Either keep it on the computer so you can go back and add new details as they come to you, or create new entries in your journal about how you’re remembering a certain day with your partner. Either way, writing stuff down will help you remember it in the long run. [4] X Research source
Let’s say you’re with your family for the holidays while your partner went back to their hometown of Boston to be with their own. Check the weather and such in Boston, just in case there’s a freak blizzard. Or say you’ve told everyone that your partner’s a real estate agent. Keep an ear out for any news of a crash in the housing market or anything like that.
Be inventive with photos. For your partner’s profile pic, use images of their interests. If they’re a surfer, use a photo of a monster wave, or if he’s a horror fan, use a pic of Bela Lugosi as Dracula. When you want to share photos of your dates, post pictures of the sites you see: a sunset, a lighthouse, the marquee of the theater you’re going to, etc. Distinguish their text from yours. Don’t write in the same “voice. ” Have them use abbreviations that you don’t use (“r” vs. “are”), or vice versa. Give them a simple catchphrase or two (“Whaddup”) or a signature name they call everyone (“bud” or “peeps”). Link your partner’s account with other people’s. Don’t raise red flags by being the only person who’s connected to your partner. If you’re only trying to fool certain people like an ex or your parents, ask friends you trust to “friend” or “follow” your partner’s account and interact with it online. If not, stick to platforms like Twitter, which links people with common interests, and avoid others like Facebook, which is more for connecting with people you already know. [7] X Research source Create your partners’ accounts sooner rather than later. Build some history for other people to see before telling anyone about it. Let other people see this new person in your life on your own page before you announce that you have a new partner.
Tread lightly if your secret is found out for sure. Depending on who you’ve told this story to and why, explain why you felt it was necessary to try and fool them. For example, if you’ve told your family you have a partner just so they would stop asking if you had found someone, open a conversation about how much they pressure you to find someone, to the point that making someone up seemed like the best solution to you.
If you need to, use photos or other images of random people for inspiration. Resist basing your imaginary partner on someone whom you know personally. You may end up feeling guilty, frustrated, and confused when they don’t act like your imaginary partner.
Where did they grow up? Where do they live now? Where do they work or go to school? Do they have any siblings?
Were their parents ever married? Are they divorced? What sort of friends did they have growing up? What were they like in school? What sort of interests and activities did they pursue? What if any religion were they brought up in?
What are their current interests? What are their hopes and dreams? What do they worry about? What do they wonder about? What values and beliefs do they hold dear?
What do you both believe in? Where do you disagree? What needs of theirs can you fulfill?
Say you’re both watching a testosterone-fueled action movie that you love, but your partner doesn’t like the way all of the female characters are sidelined as cheerleaders and sex objects. How strongly does your partner object to this? Are they just making an observation? Are they a little disappointed about this one aspect of a movie they otherwise enjoy? Or are they really, really offended by the whole thing?
