Many shy people are also naturally introverted, which means they enjoy quiet in general. They don’t have to talk, be entertained, or have music blasting in order to enjoy your company. They simply like being with you!
Being in a relationship can be a big, hard step for a shy or introverted person who usually prefers to be alone, so take the quiet and her company as huge compliments!
The more time you spend together, the faster her shyness will go away and she will have an easier time talking to you. People who are shy, quiet, or introverted also need alone time and tend to be independent, so be sure to give her space if and when she needs it. [2] X Research source
Try planning several intimate dates that involve just the two of you, like a picnic in a quiet park, a candlelight dinner at home, a trip to a museum, or a walk on a beach. You don’t always have to skip out on crowded, action-packed events, just try not to overwhelm her with them all the time.
She’ll have a much easier time with your family and friends once she’s had plenty of time to spend with just you. When the time is right, introduce her to your family and friends in small doses. Begin with a quiet dinner with your parents. Then maybe a beach day with one or two of your closest friends. Expand from there. Shy people struggle less in social environments when there are less people to focus on at any given time. If you feel unsure about timing, just ask her directly if she feels ready to start meeting your loved ones.
For example, if you’ve just moved in together, she might close the bathroom door to shower or brush her teeth, she might listen to music through her headphones, or go outside to talk to her mom. This shyness will only last while she adjusts to the new situation. It won’t last forever. Don’t take her renewed shyness personally. Moving forward with you means she’s committed.
Stating this out loud will make her directly aware of your desire to get to know her, which will give her the assurance and encouragement she needs to open up to you.
If she rides horses, ask if you join her at the barn one day. If she loves books, take her to a bookstore and go browsing together. If she enjoys hiking, ask her to take you on her favorite trail. Being in a familiar environment with someone new helps shy people feel more comfortable socializing, opening up, and showing off their private side. Experiencing her interests and hobbies with her also helps you get to know more about her and her life better without her having to try to talk or explain it, which can be hard for a shy or introverted person to do. [6] X Research source
Shy people often have trouble speaking up or initiating a conversation when it comes to stating their thoughts or feelings. By asking directly about them, you give her an easy way to open up.
You can ask if she has a way of communication that works best for her or try a few different ways on your own and see what puts her most at ease. Try sending letters to each other for an old fashioned, romantic twist on communication.
If a shy or introverted girl knows she can trust you, she will be more inclined to pursue a relationship with you. The sooner you make your intentions about the relationship known, the more comfortable and secure you will make her feel. If you can promise her a genuine, meaningful, honest relationship, she will want to put forth the time, effort, and attention in getting to know you and nurturing your bond together.
Shy and introverted people are highly observant and sensitive (in a good way), so the more open you are with her, the easier time she’ll have getting to know you and shaking off her shyness.
In fact, knowing how you feel first will help her sort out her thoughts and feelings faster and help her communicate better, when she’s ready. Just be sure to express your feelings without expecting her to immediately respond. This can be a hard thing to do, but she’ll appreciate you for it.
Even though she’s shy, it doesn’t mean she won’t want to try to experience your world, so always feel free to invite her to social events and be there by her side when she accepts. She’ll have an easier time getting used to a new environment and adapting to your world if you stick close to her, show her the ropes, and offer support if she needs it.
Shy and introverted people appreciate intense one-on-one time with the people they care about, and new experiences free of old distractions and acquaintances will help you both bond and learn more about each other.
