Many times we see qualities in celebrities that are not present in our own lives, but we wish they were. [1] X Expert Source Kateri Berasi, PsyDLicensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 9 September 2021. Perhaps they demonstrate kindness to everyone they see, and you feel most people in your life are not kind. You need to remember that celebrities are showing the world a persona – an ideal masked version – of themselves minus their more fundamental and true character traits. You don’t usually see them having a bad day or a private moment. It may ruin the image / personal brand they have been working to build. [2] X Expert Source Kateri Berasi, PsyDLicensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 9 September 2021.
Are you isolating yourself instead of participating in events? Are you quick-tempered with family or friends when you hear that your obsession has done something that upsets you? Are you feeling depressed or anxious around others and escape to privacy in order to reconnect with the object of your obsession? These are common emotions for those with a celebrity obsession. [4] X Trustworthy Source PubMed Central Journal archive from the U. S. National Institutes of Health Go to source
Clinical psychologists think of obsessions as fixations with an object, person or activity. Obsession in the psychological sense is defined as a continual thought, concept, picture or urge which is experienced as invasive and not proper, and results in significant fear, distress or discomfort. [6] X Research source
Have you had significant one-on-one meaningful interactions with this person that would allow a healthy relationship to develop? If you haven’t, then you must come to terms with the fact that you have imagined the relationship to be something far exceeding an “ordinary” connection. Researcher and professor, Brian Spitz berg, at San Diego State University’s School of Communication indicates that social media communications with celebrities via Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram can cause a fan to feel unique, as if the celebrity is speaking only to that person. This can leave you feeling confused. Relationships that are one-sided are considered to be para-social, meaning one person extends emotional energy, interest and time, and the other party, the persona, is completely unaware of the other’s existence. [7] X Research source Celebrity obsessions most always fall into this category.
Introspection is the process of directly attempting to access your own internal processes. [8] X Research source When you figure out how and why you react to the people and things around you, you will be able to help yourself solve many personal struggles. Only you can do the work that it takes to find the answers to these questions. Analysis can be difficult, but it can put you on a clear path toward change.
Research studies have identified three independent dimensions of celebrity worship. Of these three, where would you place yourself?: A. Entertainment-social: relates to attitudes where individuals are attracted to a celebrity because of their perceived ability to entertain and to become a social focus of conversation with like-minded others. B. Intense-personal: relates to individuals that have intensive and compulsive feelings about a celebrity. C. Borderline pathological: relates to individuals who display uncontrollable behaviors and fantasies relating to a celebrity. [10] X Research source
In the days of worldwide education available 24/7, you could explore a new subject every day of the year and never run out of material, and never run out of things to do or people to meet. Identify three activities you would like to learn more about or participate in. You won’t know if you like something unless you try. These will provide healthy distractions and will help you build new and meaningful relationships with others. Inform family members and friends that you are trying to find new things to do to learn more about the world. If you are comfortable with telling them about trying to stop your obsession, then do. People may give you suggestions that you haven’t thought of.
Studies have shown that people who learn social skills experience positive effects in social-emotional development and behavior.
A study in the British Journal of Health Psychology found that people who state their intention about achieving their goal far exceed control groups who do not. [15] X Research source Pick a day to start. Giving yourself a deadline will help you focus your efforts. Make sure you have supportive family and friends in place. Get rid of the items that remind you of your obsession. This may involve boxing items and giving them away, or storing them in an attic or garage. This will help you ceremoniously condense and “put away” your thoughts and feelings and set you on a new path. In this way, you are also removing potential triggers. If you slip up and find yourself back in the thick of the obsession, make some adjustments in the areas that were difficult and start again. You are allowed.
In all probability you will create and enjoy your incredible life without the help of a celebrity. They are probably too busy, and so are you.
