If you’re in elementary school and never have a passing period, you’ll need to do a bit more planning since you’ll probably need a parent to come to get you and won’t be able to just skip. Go on to the next step for other tips.
When you walk into class, really start laying it on thick. Have a deeply frowning face, and move slowly, your head down as if you had a headache. Hold your head in your hands and wait a few minutes to approach the teacher. Ask to go to the nurse. You can either actually go to the nurse and just nap for the rest of the hour, try to get sent home, or just skip going to the nurse and wander until class is over. It’s important to be a good actor. If you come into class grinning and joking with your buddies, the teacher won’t believe you if thirty seconds later you’re suffering from the black plague.
Usually the best way of doing this is to not try to fake an injury by falling or doing something else ridiculous in class, but come in selling the injury already. Walk with a limp, or hold your head in your hands to fake a head injury. Tell the teacher you hurt yourself at recess, or during gym class, or that you fell outside in the hallway and you want to go see the nurse. Again, you can usually get out of class for long enough at the nurse’s station by “resting” or you could just wander and go to class later.
This can only work if you’re not a consistent trouble-maker, and if you’ve been behaving relatively well during the rest of class. If you’ve been getting in trouble all day, or giving the teacher a hard time, then want to go to the bathroom, you’re likely to get shut-down. Pull the “emergency” card and make a concerned look with your face. No teacher wants to have a mess on their hands in class, and they’ll be likely to just let you go. Get a friend in class to collect your things for you, so you won’t have to return to the scene of the crime later.
Hide in the bathroom. Maybe the easiest way to lay low is to hide out in the bathroom. It may also be smelliest way of hanging out, so you might as well get back to class, but it’s also usually safe. If you can, try to finish the assignment you’re skipping out on while you hide. Wander the quietest wings of the school. Avoid the gym area, the band and choir wings, and other high traffic areas. Maybe go somewhere the teachers don’t know you at all, like another grade’s floor. If you’re older and have transportation, you could always just leave and go do something more fun with your time.
“Mr. Jones messed up attendance today, he told us to tell you that everyone would be getting those automated calls, but that I was in class. " At some schools, they may actually email or contact your parent in other ways, so try to find out the procedure before you do this.
If your parent usually schedules appointments for you, go ahead and do it yourself before they give you the chance to go back out to the waiting room. Then make like everything’s already taken care of.
This can be dangerous, if you have teachers who talk a lot. Try to get teachers from different departments, like a shop teacher and a math teacher, who may not be likely to communicate with one another.
Tell your teacher that you’re really upset, but be vague. Talk quietly and seriously, right before class, and ask if they’ll allow you to go talk to the guidance counsellor instead of coming to class today. If you have to come up with an excuse, try to think of something they’ll be unable to verify. No dead grandmothers. Try something like, “I think I might be having a panic attack,” instead.
Sometime, try doing a little research by asking one or both of your parents if they ever cut class when they were younger. Dig up some good stories, then use this for leverage later. If you find out your dad used to cut all the time because his math teacher was totally boring, start playing up how dull your math teacher is, and how you wish you could just come home and spend time cleaning up instead of going to class. Boom. Easy call-out.
Better yet, get someone else to make the call for you. Older siblings, cousins, or friends are all good bets. Make sure the office workers don’t know your parents very well, or they’re likely to recognize your voice and figure out that it’s not them.
Be sure to use the same color and style of pen or pencil in the original color that the note was written. If you have a friend who does not know your teacher then have them use the “bathroom” and deliver it from the “office” at some point to make it extra convincing.
Subtly complain about feeling “faint” or “weird” just before class. Breathe heavily and go to the bathroom before class starts to wet your head slightly, giving yourself a very sweaty look. Wait for awhile then give a spaced out look if you’re going to pass out. Go gradually limp if you are going to pass out then fall down to the floor, as realistically as possible. If you are doing a seizure, fall to the ground and start convulsing and doing random uncontrolled movements. Drool on yourself. Most seizures won’t last long, just a minute or two, but it’s still important to not over-sell it so you’ll start laughing or otherwise give yourself away. When you’re done, grunt and make your eyes go wide as if you’re in pain. When everyone looks at you, all freaked out, say, “What happened?” You may end up headed to the doctor, but they’ll likely call your parents first and you might be able to end up head home.
Talk to a counselor if you’re really struggling at school and feel like you need to be absent for a serious reason. Talk about it and get help.
