Dressing appropriately around your boyfriend’s parents is a sign of respect. If you’re not sure what’s appropriate, check with him. A good choice might be a simple, modest-length dress or jeans and a nice shirt.

For example, if she states “no company after 11pm,” don’t force her to have to kick you out at 11:02. Say your goodbyes before the curfew arrives.

His mom will appreciate that you allow him to have special time just with his family.

Most people greatly appreciate authenticity. Show your real personality. It’s best that they get to know the real person their son is dating. Avoid being inauthentically complimentary as well. Give a few honest compliments if they’re appropriate, such as complimenting the meal if your boyfriend’s mom cooked, but avoid gushing or over-the-top flattery. There’s a difference between being yourself and being rude, culturally inappropriate, or an over-sharer.

If she spent the weekend shopping in the city, you might ask, “So, tell me, Mrs. Charles, what sales did you catch?” If she is an avid gardener, you might say, “Oh, the azaleas look lovely, Mrs. Peterson. ”

If you like the same TV show, you might say, “Would you like to get together on Friday to watch the show?”

“Mrs. Jones, I know how close you and Todd are. I just want you to know that I really care about Todd. ” Show you care about him through your actions too. Speak well of him in front of his family, hold his hand, and laugh at his jokes. [7] X Research source If you’re spending time with your boyfriend’s mom while he isn’t there, avoid complaining about him or talking about intimate details of your relationship.

“I don’t think your mom likes me. Can you try to talk to her for me?”

For example, his mom makes a rude comment. You might say, “I couldn’t help but feel tension from you earlier. Did I say or do something wrong?” Or you could say, “I get the sense you don’t really like me, which hurts because I really care about your son. Is there a way we can work things out and be civil?”

Lots of people have misunderstandings because they listen to respond instead of listening to understand. Really think about what your boyfriend’s mom is saying. Is she really trying to hurt you, or is she just looking after the welfare of her son?[9] X Research source

Avoid asking your boyfriend’s mom for advice about relationship issues. You’ll put her in an awkward position and she probably won’t be able give you an objective opinion.

“I can’t help if you don’t like me, Mrs. Rhodes, but I expect to be treated with respect just as I do you. "

Make sure he will support you even if it means disagreeing with or spending less time with his mom. If he can’t agree to that, consider your relationship as a whole and what things you’ll be able to sacrifice.