Be grateful and glad for the time you did get to bond with your friend. Even if your friendship has dwindled or changed, you still had that opportunity to know them and grow from it as a person. As one person, you can only do so much. If you friend has moved away, or switched schools, or gotten married, there’s only so much either of you can do to keep up with one another. Don’t fault yourself for your limitations.
Think about the qualities you really value in a friend. Look for these qualities in new people. Don’t be afraid to ask that person in class or at work to hang out, or grab a cup of coffee. Add some new acquaintances on social media and send them a message.
Be open minded about making new friends. Don’t focus on finding a friend who is exactly like the one you lost. Instead, open your mind to new possibilities, and to making friends in unlikely places.
You might still run into your ex-friend, especially if they still go to the same school, or if they are involved in the same activities. But, don’t let that deter you from enjoying new things.
Even if your friend still lives nearby or still goes to the same school, getting some closure will help you feel more willing to move forward and be able to look back in happiness rather than anger or sadness.
Try writing yourself a letter where you acknowledge your part in the loss of the friendship, explain why it happened, and then offer yourself forgiveness. [3] X Research source You can also try affirming your forgiveness on a daily basis by saying out loud, “I forgive myself. “[4] X Research source
Talk to your mutual friends and explain to them what happened. If you’d rather not hang out with them while your former friend is around, politely let them know this.
Sometimes, you might need to be on your own. Give yourself that luxury, but don’t isolate yourself too much. Make sure you still reach out to others and find strength and support in friends and family.
You can keep this letter, or you can leave it at their gravesite. Or, you can simply throw it away. Whatever is going to offer you the most closure is what you should do.
A support group offers a group of people who are going through or have been through similar things. These people will be able to empathize and understand what you’re going through, as well as offer support and advice. Support groups are safe spaces, so what you say there will stay there.
Try making something tangible to display these memories. Put together a photo collage, or write about these experiences in a journal. Revisit it when you need a reminder, or put it in a visible place. [7] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source
If you isolate yourself after a loss, the loss will only feel worse, and have a larger impact on you. Instead, surround yourself with people and things you love.
Try to get outside for a little while each day. Go for a walk, ride a bike, or take a jog. You could even try opening the windows in your house to get a bit of fresh air.
If you push feelings away and refuse to feel them, you might find that you’re stuck in the grieving process even longer than you needed to be. Feel what you need to feel. Try writing in a journal to express your feelings. This will help you collect your thoughts in one place and be able to look back on them if you need to.
If you are feeling especially depressed, or if you notice any changes in your normal lifestyle, like a lack of appetite or loss of interest in things you like to do, seek help. These could be signs of mental health issues that need to be addressed. [11] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source
