You could say something like, “I respect your enthusiasm for renovations but don’t share the same passion. ” Alternatively, you may say, “I love the changes that you’re making here, but I’d like for us to spend some time on other things at least once a week. "
For example, if your partner says that they love the feeling of completing a project and getting the opportunity to be creative, you can reflect by saying, “I am hearing that you enjoy renovations because it allows you to feel a sense of creative accomplishment. ”
For example, speak at a moderate noise level. Raising your voice while communicating may suggest that you are angry, or feel like your point is not being heard. You should also keep your arms relaxed at your sides. Folded arms can give off a signal that you are not comfortable in the conversation.
Denying your partner of all future renovations would be a mistake because this is clearly something they enjoy. Instead, if you understand the pleasure they gain through renovations you may find that you are able to cope with a reasonable amount of renovating.
Decide on the exact scope of your project. [3] X Research source Get a detailed quote from multiple licensed contractors and tradespeople. [4] X Research source Be aware of low ball quotes. If a quote seems too good to be true it probably is. Add 10-20% to your budget as a contingency plan. [5] X Research source
Create a list of the things that your spouse or partner likes and tick off three things that you wouldn’t mind helping with. Check in with your partner throughout the renovation process to see how things are going. If you are knowledgeable about the day-to-day activities you will feel more involved with the entire process.
Go to a museum or art gallery. Go out for dinner. Take a long walk through your neighbourhood. Spend time with your friends. Engage in an activity with your kids. Watch a movie or TV show together.
Plan and take a mini vacation together. Rent a hotel room locally and have a date night together.
Come up with a word to say when the talk of renovations has become unbearable for you. Rather than telling your partner you can’t take it anymore you can just use a special word that signals you want to change the subject.
It is important that once you create a schedule you stick to it. Remember that these renovations are important to your spouse. If you have agreed to spend time working on the renovation you need to follow through with this.
For example, ask your spouse for at least six months without renovations once a project is completed.
